my dad

finally out last night, or should i say this morning at midnight.. going back in soon.. what a short but good day.. haha people kept coming and telling me they haven seen me for very long time today.. not very long really.. just 1 or 2 weekends? maybe considering weekdays.. so much to say but nvm.. haha

i had a dream on sat morning at 3 plus 4.. i dreamt of my dad leaving me.. as in pass away suddenly.. it felt so real cause he's quite old already.. i was so so shocked and i literally cried.. i felt so lost at that moment.. didnt know what to do.. i'm like just crying.. it was like just a dream for few minutes, cause i was so so sad crying and i woke up.. for that moment i could still feel the emotions though it was just a dream.. and service today made me think of him again..
he's the one who changed the light bulbs..
he's the one who buys new tvs/fans etc when they are spoilt..
he's the one who do the laundry at times..
he's the one who will buy kway teow dry/laksa with fishball soup for me for dinner when he knows i'm not going out..
he's the one who cooks dinner for me sometimes, even though he only cooks the same few dishes..
he's the one who buys the chilli when it's finished cause he knows i like it..
he's the one who always give me things..
he's the one who brought my medication and keys all the way to my camp for me..
actually he did much much more..
even though sometimes he irritates me, but it's better than not to have anyone around..
i almost cried out in service today thinking of him.. if he's gone, i wouldn't be able to feel him anymore.. i wouldn't be able to see him anymore.. i wouldn't have the chance to hug him.. i wouldn't have the chance to bring Christ to him anymore.. i'm gonna make all the efforts to see him getting saved.. i love my dad..