jt says i like girls who are hard to get.. those that are challenging..
xt says i am the most shallow guy on earth..
hx thinks i like flowers..
hmmm..
Wednesday, 31 December 2008
Tuesday, 30 December 2008
Sunday, 28 December 2008
was reading ken's blog.. and was thinking bout something he said.. our meetings would not be special if we do it too often.. isn't it true.. people treasures things that are rare.. hard to get.. things that are still there or can be gotten easily are often not treasured as much.. hmm
sun left.. it's gonna be quite a while to see her again.. so touched by all her works.. even though it's not the 1st time watching her humanitarian works video, but i still almost teared and touched by what she did.. all the poor children.. really felt like being part of that.. saw some of the cch people in it.. it's so nice to be part of the works isnt it.. she's really a good example or the cultural mandate.. and also fulfilling the 2 pillars of her walk with God, loving God wholeheartedly, loving people fervently..
i was so sad.. i knew it to be a joke but then.. it just make things more awkward? though they laughed but argh.. joke once twice okay.. but always.. sigh.. it makes me feel so awkward now to even face or talk to them.. hmm..
i think many people do not know me well or knew me to be a wrong person..
i am not that extrovert, i tried to be.. i am really a shy person but i tried to make myself more thick skinned for the Lord.. and it turns out i have to be thick skinned for many circumstances.. i usually keep things to myself, maybe except to jianting.. sometimes i feel so lonely by myself, at home, in my room.. i love to pray.. God makes me feel that there's still someone always for me.. i cry many times in my room praying, kneeing before Him.. i think i'm a good actor in covering my heartfelt emotions.. often im down but i'll still show my happy side to people.. my family is not a perfect family.. seen many cases with people having single parent, but me having both parents have my own family problems.. i hate to say it but money is a big problem.. I wanna leave all my Old Sins, my Old Defeats, my Old Conflicts and my Old Victories in 2008 behind..
*prays* God help me.. help me enter the new year being a new, strong young man
sun left.. it's gonna be quite a while to see her again.. so touched by all her works.. even though it's not the 1st time watching her humanitarian works video, but i still almost teared and touched by what she did.. all the poor children.. really felt like being part of that.. saw some of the cch people in it.. it's so nice to be part of the works isnt it.. she's really a good example or the cultural mandate.. and also fulfilling the 2 pillars of her walk with God, loving God wholeheartedly, loving people fervently..
i was so sad.. i knew it to be a joke but then.. it just make things more awkward? though they laughed but argh.. joke once twice okay.. but always.. sigh.. it makes me feel so awkward now to even face or talk to them.. hmm..
i think many people do not know me well or knew me to be a wrong person..
i am not that extrovert, i tried to be.. i am really a shy person but i tried to make myself more thick skinned for the Lord.. and it turns out i have to be thick skinned for many circumstances.. i usually keep things to myself, maybe except to jianting.. sometimes i feel so lonely by myself, at home, in my room.. i love to pray.. God makes me feel that there's still someone always for me.. i cry many times in my room praying, kneeing before Him.. i think i'm a good actor in covering my heartfelt emotions.. often im down but i'll still show my happy side to people.. my family is not a perfect family.. seen many cases with people having single parent, but me having both parents have my own family problems.. i hate to say it but money is a big problem.. I wanna leave all my Old Sins, my Old Defeats, my Old Conflicts and my Old Victories in 2008 behind..
*prays* God help me.. help me enter the new year being a new, strong young man
Thursday, 18 December 2008
Saturday, 13 December 2008
an old friend
haven seen you for a long long time.. kinda missing you.. remembering how enthusiastic you were.. how eccentric you were.. how we got together to pray for school.. and the test tubes that you made.. reminded of you when i saw someone who is like you.. prays for you..
Wednesday, 26 November 2008
i was reading this article..
Nap without guilt: It boosts sophisticated memory
it talks about how napping helps the brain memory, and experiments on people to confirm their theory.. it also talks about fragmented sleep, slow-wave sleep which is a period of very deep sleep and REM sleep which is the dreaming time..
Fragmented sleep can suppress the birth of new brain cells in the hippocampus, where memory-making begins.
However, a more active role for the slow-wave sleep can emerge even in a power nap.
the experiment goes like this.. 20 English College students were made to learn chi words spelled with 2 characters like mother, sister.. half the students took a 90th minute nap.. when they woke up, they took took a mcq test of chi words they'd never seen before.. however, the nappers were able to do better than those non nappers.. The nappers did much better at automatically learning that the first of the two-pair characters in the words they'd memorized earlier always meant the same thing, like 妈妈, 姐姐.. that had a 女 in front..
super cool man..
Nap without guilt: It boosts sophisticated memory
it talks about how napping helps the brain memory, and experiments on people to confirm their theory.. it also talks about fragmented sleep, slow-wave sleep which is a period of very deep sleep and REM sleep which is the dreaming time..
Fragmented sleep can suppress the birth of new brain cells in the hippocampus, where memory-making begins.
However, a more active role for the slow-wave sleep can emerge even in a power nap.
the experiment goes like this.. 20 English College students were made to learn chi words spelled with 2 characters like mother, sister.. half the students took a 90th minute nap.. when they woke up, they took took a mcq test of chi words they'd never seen before.. however, the nappers were able to do better than those non nappers.. The nappers did much better at automatically learning that the first of the two-pair characters in the words they'd memorized earlier always meant the same thing, like 妈妈, 姐姐.. that had a 女 in front..
super cool man..
woah.. it's exactly one month i haven blogged..
i'm finally back from taiwan.. i mean actually i'm back already for the Asia Conference.. haha..
so so so tiring but the 3 days of roaming around taipei is fun lah.. though it's not long enough.. i went New Life Church on the sunday.. it was pretty cool man.. they used a basement of a primary school beside their building for the main service and their style is very similar to ours..
Pst Abraham Ku preaches very loud, make sure their youths are not sleeping.. but everything's in chinese.. after that i had to rush back to get ready to fly back..
and flew back in time for Asia Conference!! it was awesome, powerpact, super anointed.. what else can i say.. probably the queuing was crazy!! oh and the lunches are GOOD man! peter luen and i were talking about it, if Pst Kong said that the food is ordinary, then what is army food? junk? hahaha.. and i really wanna thank God that my soccer team actually won the champion for the 5-on-5.. i didn't expect it, even for them to qualify for the prelims.. didnt manage to play prelims on the previous sat cause i was in tw.. so they made it.. and really, our whole team was playing fair play i would say.. and all of us really commit everything to God.. during the games, many suffered injuries, however we didn't give up.. we were praying asking for strength and stuff.. and we just prayed we would play our best even though all of us wanted to win.. and there and there we won.. other than just winning, we built friendships.. some of us weren't as close as before but we made it together and became soccer buddies.. really enjoyed the team =).. oh most importantly, we had the favour of the referee i think.. because our team is really slow to wrath, and we just played whatever the ref commands... anyhow, i'll be looking forward the playing more games together.. hahah
i'm finally back from taiwan.. i mean actually i'm back already for the Asia Conference.. haha..
so so so tiring but the 3 days of roaming around taipei is fun lah.. though it's not long enough.. i went New Life Church on the sunday.. it was pretty cool man.. they used a basement of a primary school beside their building for the main service and their style is very similar to ours..
Pst Abraham Ku preaches very loud, make sure their youths are not sleeping.. but everything's in chinese.. after that i had to rush back to get ready to fly back..
and flew back in time for Asia Conference!! it was awesome, powerpact, super anointed.. what else can i say.. probably the queuing was crazy!! oh and the lunches are GOOD man! peter luen and i were talking about it, if Pst Kong said that the food is ordinary, then what is army food? junk? hahaha.. and i really wanna thank God that my soccer team actually won the champion for the 5-on-5.. i didn't expect it, even for them to qualify for the prelims.. didnt manage to play prelims on the previous sat cause i was in tw.. so they made it.. and really, our whole team was playing fair play i would say.. and all of us really commit everything to God.. during the games, many suffered injuries, however we didn't give up.. we were praying asking for strength and stuff.. and we just prayed we would play our best even though all of us wanted to win.. and there and there we won.. other than just winning, we built friendships.. some of us weren't as close as before but we made it together and became soccer buddies.. really enjoyed the team =).. oh most importantly, we had the favour of the referee i think.. because our team is really slow to wrath, and we just played whatever the ref commands... anyhow, i'll be looking forward the playing more games together.. hahah
Sunday, 26 October 2008
Saturday, 18 October 2008
i dreamt alot this week.. due to lots and lots of... sleep!! haha.. this week slept too much.. while others are out in field doing survival training, i was to stay in camp.. not to slack but to go for a short course on some technology(secret).. spend so much money on canteen food cause no ration was indented for us.. anyway.. the course is like 4-5 hours in total only so the rest of the time, mostly sleeping or doing other stuffs.. and my friends and i went spec mess to play xbox.. so funny..
anyhow.. i had alot of weird dreams man, while sleeping in bunk..
i dreamt that i went service, booked seats as usual, some rows quite in front.. then somehow, i heard an announcement made to ask us to pray.. everyone then started walking out to the side of the main hall.. and outside was a queue to some prayer counsellors.. like queue up to talk to this person about what we wanna pray for and pray together.. someone in front of me seems familiar but i forgot is who.. anyway.. finally it was my turn and praise had started.. the person asked me very weird stuffs like the drinks of don't know what was going bad so had to pray for it.. anyway, when i heard one of the praise song i like, i told her i'll continue later and ran to the main hall.. it was Take a hold of me.... when i reached the main hall, the chairs disappeared only those in front of the stage.. suddenly i see everyone dancing to the song, same action, totally coordinated.. i'm like how come everyone knows the dance moves for that song.. so i'm like okay.. then i went to search for my bag and saw hx sitting at the side.. i asked her what happened and she just said the chairs were removed.. oh, and something really weird.. the lcd screen playing the praise and worship was recorded.. meaning like you know, like playing from a dvd.. cause somehow the praise halfway, the screen showed as though the 'dvd' was dirty so there was these horizontal grey lines appeared moving upwards.. then worship song suddenly played from halfway of it.. soo weird.. i only remember seeing annabel the only person on stage.. then after everything, everyone sat on the floor for service.. and i started seeing familiar people sitting beside me.. weird weird weird..
and it continues on after the service..
samuel cheesiang jianguang glenn me ying and yulan went for some outing.. we were sitting in this thing that looks like a skytrain (start to imagine) but it's on water meaning like the sea, where half of it is totally covered and the front is like transparent.. then the front is where the opening was, meaning like the door but it opens like a lamborghini door.. i think we were playing some lame game.. cause whenever this 'skytrain' reaches a place, the door will open and then someone will just point a finger gun and shoot at anyone.. i mean the first person.. it meant something but haha.. glenn was like shooting and laughing.. ying being the usual just did randomise shooting.. i think everyone did play a part in the shooting except yulan.. so ying said yulan's like that very blur.. she was quietly looking at the sea and when she heard ying said her name, she turned to us giving us the 'huh' look and smiled.. then we reached this place.. oh ya.. very weird.. we went so many places but never alight.. so at this place, yulan and cheesiang alighted.. and this place is nothing but like a small platform with length up to 2 railings only.. they were nicely viewing the scenery.. i was sitting beside ying and then we realised everyone disappeared.. all the rest went hiding at the back of the 'skytrain' for shade.. ying said, weather so hot, you all are quite smart.. as she was moving there, i saw the door suddenly closes.. yulan then realised but both of them didnt have enough time to board.. so then she went to sit on a railing.. after sitting on it for like a sec she slipped off and fell onto the floor.. jianguang then said butt long ma.. ying replied might as well said it's slippery(hua42)..jianguang, 'cannot, tingting will say she you lian guo..' hahaha it's so lol la..
* a big change *
anyhow.. i had alot of weird dreams man, while sleeping in bunk..
i dreamt that i went service, booked seats as usual, some rows quite in front.. then somehow, i heard an announcement made to ask us to pray.. everyone then started walking out to the side of the main hall.. and outside was a queue to some prayer counsellors.. like queue up to talk to this person about what we wanna pray for and pray together.. someone in front of me seems familiar but i forgot is who.. anyway.. finally it was my turn and praise had started.. the person asked me very weird stuffs like the drinks of don't know what was going bad so had to pray for it.. anyway, when i heard one of the praise song i like, i told her i'll continue later and ran to the main hall.. it was Take a hold of me.... when i reached the main hall, the chairs disappeared only those in front of the stage.. suddenly i see everyone dancing to the song, same action, totally coordinated.. i'm like how come everyone knows the dance moves for that song.. so i'm like okay.. then i went to search for my bag and saw hx sitting at the side.. i asked her what happened and she just said the chairs were removed.. oh, and something really weird.. the lcd screen playing the praise and worship was recorded.. meaning like you know, like playing from a dvd.. cause somehow the praise halfway, the screen showed as though the 'dvd' was dirty so there was these horizontal grey lines appeared moving upwards.. then worship song suddenly played from halfway of it.. soo weird.. i only remember seeing annabel the only person on stage.. then after everything, everyone sat on the floor for service.. and i started seeing familiar people sitting beside me.. weird weird weird..
and it continues on after the service..
samuel cheesiang jianguang glenn me ying and yulan went for some outing.. we were sitting in this thing that looks like a skytrain (start to imagine) but it's on water meaning like the sea, where half of it is totally covered and the front is like transparent.. then the front is where the opening was, meaning like the door but it opens like a lamborghini door.. i think we were playing some lame game.. cause whenever this 'skytrain' reaches a place, the door will open and then someone will just point a finger gun and shoot at anyone.. i mean the first person.. it meant something but haha.. glenn was like shooting and laughing.. ying being the usual just did randomise shooting.. i think everyone did play a part in the shooting except yulan.. so ying said yulan's like that very blur.. she was quietly looking at the sea and when she heard ying said her name, she turned to us giving us the 'huh' look and smiled.. then we reached this place.. oh ya.. very weird.. we went so many places but never alight.. so at this place, yulan and cheesiang alighted.. and this place is nothing but like a small platform with length up to 2 railings only.. they were nicely viewing the scenery.. i was sitting beside ying and then we realised everyone disappeared.. all the rest went hiding at the back of the 'skytrain' for shade.. ying said, weather so hot, you all are quite smart.. as she was moving there, i saw the door suddenly closes.. yulan then realised but both of them didnt have enough time to board.. so then she went to sit on a railing.. after sitting on it for like a sec she slipped off and fell onto the floor.. jianguang then said butt long ma.. ying replied might as well said it's slippery(hua42)..jianguang, 'cannot, tingting will say she you lian guo..' hahaha it's so lol la..
* a big change *
Sunday, 12 October 2008
hmm.. seems like a big change is gonna happen.. pray pray pray..
went out with jackson tan and jon just now.. seems like it has been a long time we last went out together.. seems like some people are missing in action.. haha.. and we need to renew our membership together.. anyhow.. jon was talking about youth cell groups and his vision to go cch cell.. i was thinking about the ministry then.. cch cg? hmm.. kinda sad when both of them were saying the people that wanted to go same cch cg together.. haha let's move forward and continue to fulfil our visions =)..
booking in time! so early.. haha..
went out with jackson tan and jon just now.. seems like it has been a long time we last went out together.. seems like some people are missing in action.. haha.. and we need to renew our membership together.. anyhow.. jon was talking about youth cell groups and his vision to go cch cell.. i was thinking about the ministry then.. cch cg? hmm.. kinda sad when both of them were saying the people that wanted to go same cch cg together.. haha let's move forward and continue to fulfil our visions =)..
booking in time! so early.. haha..
Saturday, 4 October 2008
just came back.. hmmm.. adults are actually that humble too..
when mk's member(rick) agreed to drop us somewhere near.. mk just told hx that he can fetch them home.. and rick just said also can without much thought.. you get what i'm trying to say right..
and he was supposed to drop me at clementi, but he asked me if there are any more trains.. i replied think so and he just said might as well fetch me home.. so nice right..
oohh.. by2's on yu le bai fen bai.. they're powerful.. hahah..
when mk's member(rick) agreed to drop us somewhere near.. mk just told hx that he can fetch them home.. and rick just said also can without much thought.. you get what i'm trying to say right..
and he was supposed to drop me at clementi, but he asked me if there are any more trains.. i replied think so and he just said might as well fetch me home.. so nice right..
oohh.. by2's on yu le bai fen bai.. they're powerful.. hahah..
Monday, 22 September 2008
Sunday, 14 September 2008
走火入魔
对不起 刚才我 是不是听错
还是我 想太多 想到了昏头
天气 不错 开了窗 吹走脸红
进一步 退一步 都害怕打破
更不想 在原地 永远作朋友
给你 线索 也给我 勇敢藉口
下定决心 沉默
就让沉默 为我们追究
你和我 这一刻
无声的 耳语交流
却突然震耳欲聋
一字一句一瞬间 走了火
一天一点一转眼 入了魔
忘了我从什么时候
忘了你为什么能够让我
一步一步 走火入魔
和我
一直猜 一直想 一直的揣摩
一直到 你变成 甜蜜的心痛
如果 可以 把如果 变成结果
下定决心 执着
就让执着 为我们突破
我和你 的小说 这时候 出现烟火
让情节充满感动
一字一句一瞬间 走了火
一天一点一转眼 入了魔
忘了我从什么时候
忘了你为什么能够让我
一步一步 走火入魔
一字一句一瞬间 走了火
一天一点一转眼 入了魔
如果你有相同感受
感受到有种突然的冲动
放肆一次 走火入魔
和我
was just randomly playing my play list and heard this song.. listen upmteen times.. but still think it's nice.. haha..
*sonship*
it's so good and interesting..
还是我 想太多 想到了昏头
天气 不错 开了窗 吹走脸红
进一步 退一步 都害怕打破
更不想 在原地 永远作朋友
给你 线索 也给我 勇敢藉口
下定决心 沉默
就让沉默 为我们追究
你和我 这一刻
无声的 耳语交流
却突然震耳欲聋
一字一句一瞬间 走了火
一天一点一转眼 入了魔
忘了我从什么时候
忘了你为什么能够让我
一步一步 走火入魔
和我
一直猜 一直想 一直的揣摩
一直到 你变成 甜蜜的心痛
如果 可以 把如果 变成结果
下定决心 执着
就让执着 为我们突破
我和你 的小说 这时候 出现烟火
让情节充满感动
一字一句一瞬间 走了火
一天一点一转眼 入了魔
忘了我从什么时候
忘了你为什么能够让我
一步一步 走火入魔
一字一句一瞬间 走了火
一天一点一转眼 入了魔
如果你有相同感受
感受到有种突然的冲动
放肆一次 走火入魔
和我
was just randomly playing my play list and heard this song.. listen upmteen times.. but still think it's nice.. haha..
*sonship*
it's so good and interesting..
Wednesday, 3 September 2008
Monday, 1 September 2008
an image
so long haven been to service.. hmm this week's good.. Rev Casey Treat talks about faith.. having faith to believe.. all things are possible to those who believe.. cell group this week, during the last worship, i saw an image, a picture.. and the revelation behind it was to be faithful.. hmmm.. it was quite vivid and i guess.. i'll have to pray...
Sunday, 24 August 2008
tired
soooo tired today.. prepared for the Safra Bay Run and AHM for 2 weeks.. finally it's over.. stayed over at padang since last night.. didn't sleep much.. bout 1 hr only probably.. i was stationed at the 10km U-turn point.. quite cool seeing the people running.. saw some familiar faces and hearing the bbbbbeeeeeeeeepppppppp sound during the middle of the bell curve.. cause there is this mat that records the timing when you run past it.. and on the left leg of each competitor there is a champion chip.. that is the thing that the mat senses and records the timing.. and everytime the chip is on top of the mat it'll have a continuous beep sound.. imagine when a huge long crowd runs past.. haha and ying i'm feeling what you're feeling the last time when you didnt sleep..
anyway.. went for the movie at expo.. quite disappointed because i thought there would be a few people going.. in the end i was alone and was so confused with the tickets and goodie bags thing.. especially when i didn't sleep and was tired.. anyhow the movie was quite good and it was quite a good hmmm concert? haha..
had this weird feeling coming back again..
i shall not be affected by it..
pray pray pray..
trial to overcoming disappointment and temptation?
anyway.. went for the movie at expo.. quite disappointed because i thought there would be a few people going.. in the end i was alone and was so confused with the tickets and goodie bags thing.. especially when i didn't sleep and was tired.. anyhow the movie was quite good and it was quite a good hmmm concert? haha..
had this weird feeling coming back again..
i shall not be affected by it..
pray pray pray..
trial to overcoming disappointment and temptation?
Monday, 18 August 2008
just came back from jt's place.. going to his place always give me revelations.. anyway.. on my way home.. it feels kind of good to just pray in tongues and sing worship songs to God.. it's just praying to God randomly but it feels so good.. and the thing is the worship songs that i normally sing happens to be cch's songs.. haha.. maybe because it's easy to sing and if you can imagine the children singing, the presence of God is really strong... =)
Thursday, 14 August 2008
you'll never win if you give up (如果你放弃就不能赢)
and winners never give up (赢的人从来不放弃)
a champion is not someone who never lose
but is someone who never quits
helping with the safra singapore bay run cum ahm.. have to go to safra toa payoh everyday.. something quite exciting cause get to be the 'ambassador'.. actually is just to be the first point of contact if anyone is unsure of what to do or be like usher.. but it's quite cool cause we're holding the some form of responsibility because the people who approaches us may be some big shots in saf.. from the guy who talked to us, there might be people wanting to test the system, test our service.. so quite an experience.. it's starting tmr so ya.. never do much today but still tired..
and winners never give up (赢的人从来不放弃)
a champion is not someone who never lose
but is someone who never quits
helping with the safra singapore bay run cum ahm.. have to go to safra toa payoh everyday.. something quite exciting cause get to be the 'ambassador'.. actually is just to be the first point of contact if anyone is unsure of what to do or be like usher.. but it's quite cool cause we're holding the some form of responsibility because the people who approaches us may be some big shots in saf.. from the guy who talked to us, there might be people wanting to test the system, test our service.. so quite an experience.. it's starting tmr so ya.. never do much today but still tired..
Friday, 8 August 2008
hey! today's a nice date.. 080808.. to get married.. haha.. random stuffs that my ns friends commented.. anyway..
breakthrough in one area
now going for higher level of breakthrough in another area
God always sets me going for another level of maturity
overcoming higher levels of difficulty
to go to a greater level of breakthrough
enduring another level..
haha.. going for overnight cycling with my cg.. don't know who's going.. but it's ok.. i missed the first one with them..so ya.. leaving now..
breakthrough in one area
now going for higher level of breakthrough in another area
God always sets me going for another level of maturity
overcoming higher levels of difficulty
to go to a greater level of breakthrough
enduring another level..
haha.. going for overnight cycling with my cg.. don't know who's going.. but it's ok.. i missed the first one with them..so ya.. leaving now..
Monday, 28 July 2008
Saturday, 19 July 2008
Sunday, 6 July 2008
my dad
finally out last night, or should i say this morning at midnight.. going back in soon.. what a short but good day.. haha people kept coming and telling me they haven seen me for very long time today.. not very long really.. just 1 or 2 weekends? maybe considering weekdays.. so much to say but nvm.. haha
i had a dream on sat morning at 3 plus 4.. i dreamt of my dad leaving me.. as in pass away suddenly.. it felt so real cause he's quite old already.. i was so so shocked and i literally cried.. i felt so lost at that moment.. didnt know what to do.. i'm like just crying.. it was like just a dream for few minutes, cause i was so so sad crying and i woke up.. for that moment i could still feel the emotions though it was just a dream.. and service today made me think of him again..
he's the one who changed the light bulbs..
he's the one who buys new tvs/fans etc when they are spoilt..
he's the one who do the laundry at times..
he's the one who will buy kway teow dry/laksa with fishball soup for me for dinner when he knows i'm not going out..
he's the one who cooks dinner for me sometimes, even though he only cooks the same few dishes..
he's the one who buys the chilli when it's finished cause he knows i like it..
he's the one who always give me things..
he's the one who brought my medication and keys all the way to my camp for me..
actually he did much much more..
even though sometimes he irritates me, but it's better than not to have anyone around..
i almost cried out in service today thinking of him.. if he's gone, i wouldn't be able to feel him anymore.. i wouldn't be able to see him anymore.. i wouldn't have the chance to hug him.. i wouldn't have the chance to bring Christ to him anymore.. i'm gonna make all the efforts to see him getting saved.. i love my dad..
i had a dream on sat morning at 3 plus 4.. i dreamt of my dad leaving me.. as in pass away suddenly.. it felt so real cause he's quite old already.. i was so so shocked and i literally cried.. i felt so lost at that moment.. didnt know what to do.. i'm like just crying.. it was like just a dream for few minutes, cause i was so so sad crying and i woke up.. for that moment i could still feel the emotions though it was just a dream.. and service today made me think of him again..
he's the one who changed the light bulbs..
he's the one who buys new tvs/fans etc when they are spoilt..
he's the one who do the laundry at times..
he's the one who will buy kway teow dry/laksa with fishball soup for me for dinner when he knows i'm not going out..
he's the one who cooks dinner for me sometimes, even though he only cooks the same few dishes..
he's the one who buys the chilli when it's finished cause he knows i like it..
he's the one who always give me things..
he's the one who brought my medication and keys all the way to my camp for me..
actually he did much much more..
even though sometimes he irritates me, but it's better than not to have anyone around..
i almost cried out in service today thinking of him.. if he's gone, i wouldn't be able to feel him anymore.. i wouldn't be able to see him anymore.. i wouldn't have the chance to hug him.. i wouldn't have the chance to bring Christ to him anymore.. i'm gonna make all the efforts to see him getting saved.. i love my dad..
Monday, 30 June 2008
Saturday, 28 June 2008
heaviness of my head, my body, my heart
super tired.. so long haven had free time.. what's more i'm suppose to be sleeping.. haha.. tmr booking in morning to sleep also.. night duty.. so ya..
been so bad recently cause of one guy.. so double-faced.. super impatient, whether it's a small or big thing, first reaction is to scold or talk with a we-had-done-something-wrong tone.. always shouting to anyone.. overused power/authority.. he's got so much to learn just coming back after graduating from uni.. and yet he picks on people.. almost ran out of patience on him.. hmmm..
i need Your endurance
i need Your strength
i need Your patience
i need Your forgiving heart
i need Your love for people..
been so bad recently cause of one guy.. so double-faced.. super impatient, whether it's a small or big thing, first reaction is to scold or talk with a we-had-done-something-wrong tone.. always shouting to anyone.. overused power/authority.. he's got so much to learn just coming back after graduating from uni.. and yet he picks on people.. almost ran out of patience on him.. hmmm..
i need Your endurance
i need Your strength
i need Your patience
i need Your forgiving heart
i need Your love for people..
Sunday, 15 June 2008
Tuesday, 3 June 2008
just this morning.. my sis scolded my mum cause she complained that my sis ALWAYS never clear her hair in the toilet.. the word is always.. but she was pissed because it's not always.. sometimes my mum never think before she speaks and offend people.. and one little thing she must announce it to the whole world..
but then again, i felt bad.. cause few days ago i just scolded her also.. then felt God speaking to me, a soft answer turns away wrath.. and indeed we're not bearing a good testimony at home.. sometimes my mum do things without thinking of other's feelings.. but why cant i just tell her in a nicer way.. cause she wouldn't make it a point and would forget all about it.. and then hx's post came to my mind.. i was so touched.. almost wanted to cry.. God reminded me of all the little things she did for me..
1) she would wake up as early as 5am to prepare breakfast for me when i was schooling.
2) though i may complain about her food sometimes, but she still make breakfast for me.
3) she would wake me up though i set alarm and i would just shout i know cause i wanted to rest a little more.
4) whenever i'm sick (even till now), she would make some drink (dont know what) and feed me medicine though i may refused because it's so bitter..
5) she still handwash some of my clothes even when her hands are peeling and she told me that her hands are pain and numb.
6) she's still working to support the family even at 60 because she gave birth to me at the age of 42.
7) when my dad bought dinner for her, she would leave some for me when i'm not back home yet.
8) she gave me money when i dont have to spare even if that's her last few dollars.
9) she buys food for me when she sees me staying at home during weekends.
10) i told her i prefer milo with sugar and she would remember and make milo for me at night.
11) i hated cooked egg yolk and she tries not to make the yolk harden when she cooks for me.
12) she asked about me when she sees me at home when i'm rarely and not supposed to. cause i seldom talk at home. cant believe it?
and i was reminded of the things i didnt do for her.. mothers' day when my friend asked me what did i give to her.. her birthday.. complained when she washed my clothes till the colours fades and so on....... and i would regret if i never bring Christ to her in her lifetime..
continues praying for her..
but then again, i felt bad.. cause few days ago i just scolded her also.. then felt God speaking to me, a soft answer turns away wrath.. and indeed we're not bearing a good testimony at home.. sometimes my mum do things without thinking of other's feelings.. but why cant i just tell her in a nicer way.. cause she wouldn't make it a point and would forget all about it.. and then hx's post came to my mind.. i was so touched.. almost wanted to cry.. God reminded me of all the little things she did for me..
1) she would wake up as early as 5am to prepare breakfast for me when i was schooling.
2) though i may complain about her food sometimes, but she still make breakfast for me.
3) she would wake me up though i set alarm and i would just shout i know cause i wanted to rest a little more.
4) whenever i'm sick (even till now), she would make some drink (dont know what) and feed me medicine though i may refused because it's so bitter..
5) she still handwash some of my clothes even when her hands are peeling and she told me that her hands are pain and numb.
6) she's still working to support the family even at 60 because she gave birth to me at the age of 42.
7) when my dad bought dinner for her, she would leave some for me when i'm not back home yet.
8) she gave me money when i dont have to spare even if that's her last few dollars.
9) she buys food for me when she sees me staying at home during weekends.
10) i told her i prefer milo with sugar and she would remember and make milo for me at night.
11) i hated cooked egg yolk and she tries not to make the yolk harden when she cooks for me.
12) she asked about me when she sees me at home when i'm rarely and not supposed to. cause i seldom talk at home. cant believe it?
and i was reminded of the things i didnt do for her.. mothers' day when my friend asked me what did i give to her.. her birthday.. complained when she washed my clothes till the colours fades and so on....... and i would regret if i never bring Christ to her in her lifetime..
continues praying for her..
玫瑰? 百合? 郁金香? 勿忘我? 紫罗兰? 你喜欢什么花呢? 哈! 不论你找到什么花, 最重要是花瓶要有能力装得住花, 加油! 淑莹
this is what she wrote for me in the book mark before she left.. it was just a joke but yet, she gave me a ... answer.. i don't know what word to use.. but it really touched my heart.. and the testimony that chun yew shared really blessed me.. so touched and happy that we actually made a difference in her life.. so gonna miss her around..
this is what she wrote for me in the book mark before she left.. it was just a joke but yet, she gave me a ... answer.. i don't know what word to use.. but it really touched my heart.. and the testimony that chun yew shared really blessed me.. so touched and happy that we actually made a difference in her life.. so gonna miss her around..
Sunday, 1 June 2008
suddenly felt so guilty seeing my dad and mum at home..
don't know why but i was so pissed yday and shouted at them..
wants to clear all the misunderstandings..
pray that everything will be fine..
blame it on my bad temper yday due to a small problem
scolded her cause she washed my clothes(that i didnt wanna wash yet) that i hanged in the toilet.. actually i.. aiya.. explanation the next time.. treasure your mummies.. though they may do things that sometimes irritate us but.. think for them.. and my mum is 60..
don't know why but i was so pissed yday and shouted at them..
wants to clear all the misunderstandings..
pray that everything will be fine..
blame it on my bad temper yday due to a small problem
scolded her cause she washed my clothes(that i didnt wanna wash yet) that i hanged in the toilet.. actually i.. aiya.. explanation the next time.. treasure your mummies.. though they may do things that sometimes irritate us but.. think for them.. and my mum is 60..
hmm.. home super early.. super bored.. trying to watch conan.. but load super slow.. aiya.. cant find people to go watch movie with.. guess gotta go watch myself before they're gone..
another great service..
fighting warfare at home..
pray pray pray.. bind bind bind..
anyway.. 'mummy' 's tag so funny.. hahaha
another great service..
fighting warfare at home..
pray pray pray.. bind bind bind..
anyway.. 'mummy' 's tag so funny.. hahaha
Sunday, 25 May 2008
short entry.. rushing to book in..
service was great.. pm was wonderful..
presence was felt strongly..
regain my confidence which i lost..
afraid to move in the Spirit..
but now..
tangible presence..
haven felt that way in a long long time..
much much greater than what i'm capable..
I love You Jesus
great assurance from You really changes my thinking..
service was great.. pm was wonderful..
presence was felt strongly..
regain my confidence which i lost..
afraid to move in the Spirit..
but now..
tangible presence..
haven felt that way in a long long time..
much much greater than what i'm capable..
I love You Jesus
great assurance from You really changes my thinking..
Wednesday, 21 May 2008
heart full of emotions after watching the 9pm show..
so many things i wanna say..
why do shows like to use christian funerals when they want to portray a quiet funeral and not a chinese one?
this really struck me i'm serious.. i heard God speaking.. He says, because in Him, we can find peace..
one wrong choice.. taking things for granted.. not treasuring.. not realising the things and situations around.. people regret..
while i was bathing..
why only think of the bad things people do.. think of what good they had done for you..
so many things i wanna say..
why do shows like to use christian funerals when they want to portray a quiet funeral and not a chinese one?
this really struck me i'm serious.. i heard God speaking.. He says, because in Him, we can find peace..
one wrong choice.. taking things for granted.. not treasuring.. not realising the things and situations around.. people regret..
while i was bathing..
why only think of the bad things people do.. think of what good they had done for you..
Sunday, 18 May 2008
happy belated birthday to myself..
great birthday celebrations
great birthday gifts
great birthday wishes
what can i say..
hmm why is birthday so significant?
祝我生日快乐
我知道伤心不能改变什么
那么让我诚实一点
诚实难免有不能控制的宣泄
只要关上了门不必理谁
一个人坐在空荡包厢里面
手机让它休息一夜 难
像切歌切掉回忆的画面
眼泪不能流过十二点
生日快乐
我对自己说
蜡烛点了
寂寞亮了
生日快乐
泪也融了
我要谢谢你给的你拿走的一切
还爱你
带一点恨
还要时间
才能平衡
热恋伤痕
幻灭重生
祝我生日快乐
great birthday celebrations
great birthday gifts
great birthday wishes
what can i say..
hmm why is birthday so significant?
祝我生日快乐
我知道伤心不能改变什么
那么让我诚实一点
诚实难免有不能控制的宣泄
只要关上了门不必理谁
一个人坐在空荡包厢里面
手机让它休息一夜 难
像切歌切掉回忆的画面
眼泪不能流过十二点
生日快乐
我对自己说
蜡烛点了
寂寞亮了
生日快乐
泪也融了
我要谢谢你给的你拿走的一切
还爱你
带一点恨
还要时间
才能平衡
热恋伤痕
幻灭重生
祝我生日快乐
The best thing about tonight's that we're not fighting
Could it be that we have been this way before
I know you don't think that I am trying
I know you're wearing thin down to the core
But hold your breath
Because tonight will be the night that I will fall for you
Over again
Don't make me change my mind
Or I wont live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a girl like you is impossible to find
Your impossible to find
This is not what I intended
I always swore to you I'd never fall apart
You always thought that I was stronger
I may have failed
But I have loved you from the start
Ohhhh
So breathe in so deep
Breathe me in
I'm yours to keep
And hold onto your words
Cause talk is cheap
And remember me tonight
When your asleep
Could it be that we have been this way before
I know you don't think that I am trying
I know you're wearing thin down to the core
But hold your breath
Because tonight will be the night that I will fall for you
Over again
Don't make me change my mind
Or I wont live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a girl like you is impossible to find
Your impossible to find
This is not what I intended
I always swore to you I'd never fall apart
You always thought that I was stronger
I may have failed
But I have loved you from the start
Ohhhh
So breathe in so deep
Breathe me in
I'm yours to keep
And hold onto your words
Cause talk is cheap
And remember me tonight
When your asleep
Friday, 16 May 2008
Sunday, 11 May 2008
Thursday, 8 May 2008
Wednesday, 7 May 2008
Sunday, 4 May 2008
Jesus You
You hold the world with Your unfailing love
The heaven sings Your praises from above
In Your name lips shall praise and knees shall bow
Father You
The universe exalts in who You are
The stars declare Your wonder far and wide
How majestic is Your love throughout my life
In You.. I find my peace
In You.. I bend my knees
You are Lord of Heaven
You shall Reign in all the earth
I humbly bow before Your majesty
Now I will sing Your praises
And I will sing forevermore
I'm captivated by Your love in me
I need some prayers.. I meant I seriously need alot of prayers..
confused, disturbed, stuggled..
You hold the world with Your unfailing love
The heaven sings Your praises from above
In Your name lips shall praise and knees shall bow
Father You
The universe exalts in who You are
The stars declare Your wonder far and wide
How majestic is Your love throughout my life
In You.. I find my peace
In You.. I bend my knees
You are Lord of Heaven
You shall Reign in all the earth
I humbly bow before Your majesty
Now I will sing Your praises
And I will sing forevermore
I'm captivated by Your love in me
I need some prayers.. I meant I seriously need alot of prayers..
confused, disturbed, stuggled..
Friday, 2 May 2008
hmm.. what a holiday.. supposed(you know why later) to go prawning on wed night with mingli, hf, xt and jt.. in the end jeanie drove us all there except mingli.. saw this small 'pond' where the people are prawning.. 2 rows of people standing from one end of a 'bridge' to the other end.. hf thinks they looked funny.. haha considering too many people and too many flies, hf suggested us to go else where to bbq the food we brought.. so we went cold storage at holland v to buy the bbq stuffs and went west coast.. and we bbqed successfully.. then we went to play at the 'playground' at west coast.. xt is so afraid of heights.. super funny.. and hf is so lazy to do the obstacle course.. i think she cant.. haha.. so long haven had such fun over the night outside.. enjoyed myself..
slept at 0530, woke up at 0815, changed and took train to kembangan for soccer(field).. stayed outside with the rest at town before i left for eunos for another soccer game(street soccer).. super super tired that night.. fall dead on my bed slept all the way to 0900 this morning..
had a revelation that my dad is actually very nice though sometimes he would quarrel with me.. had another revelation while walking to cg.. to teach people who are poor in math to be able to score well and love math.. don't know why it came to my mind but anyhow.. haha..
seeking God..
slept at 0530, woke up at 0815, changed and took train to kembangan for soccer(field).. stayed outside with the rest at town before i left for eunos for another soccer game(street soccer).. super super tired that night.. fall dead on my bed slept all the way to 0900 this morning..
had a revelation that my dad is actually very nice though sometimes he would quarrel with me.. had another revelation while walking to cg.. to teach people who are poor in math to be able to score well and love math.. don't know why it came to my mind but anyhow.. haha..
seeking God..
Friday, 25 April 2008
Monday, 21 April 2008
为你写诗
i think i agree with hf.. this song is nice..
爱情是一种怪事 我开始全身不受控制
爱情是一种本事 我开始连自己都不是
为你我做了太多的傻事
第一件就是 为你写诗
为你写诗 为你静止
为你做不可能的事
为你我学会弹琴写词
为你失去理智
为你写诗 为你静止
为你做不可能的事
为你弹奏所有情歌的句子
我忘了说 最美的是你的名字
爱情是一种怪事 你的笑容是唯一宗旨
爱情是一种本事 我在你心里什么位置
为你我做了太多的傻事
第一件就是 为你写诗
为你写诗 为你静止
为你做不可能的事
为你我学会弹琴写词
为你失去理智
为你写诗 为你静止
为你做不可能的事
为你弹奏所有情歌的句子
我忘了 说最美的是你的名字
我什么都能忘记 但唯一不忘的是你的名字
我什么都能忘记 但唯一不忘的是你的样子
我什么都能忘记 但唯一不忘的是你的名字
我什么都能忘记 但唯一不忘的是你的样子
爱情是一种怪事 我开始全身不受控制
爱情是一种本事 我开始连自己都不是
为你我做了太多的傻事
第一件就是 为你写诗
为你写诗 为你静止
为你做不可能的事
为你我学会弹琴写词
为你失去理智
为你写诗 为你静止
为你做不可能的事
为你弹奏所有情歌的句子
我忘了说 最美的是你的名字
爱情是一种怪事 你的笑容是唯一宗旨
爱情是一种本事 我在你心里什么位置
为你我做了太多的傻事
第一件就是 为你写诗
为你写诗 为你静止
为你做不可能的事
为你我学会弹琴写词
为你失去理智
为你写诗 为你静止
为你做不可能的事
为你弹奏所有情歌的句子
我忘了 说最美的是你的名字
我什么都能忘记 但唯一不忘的是你的名字
我什么都能忘记 但唯一不忘的是你的样子
我什么都能忘记 但唯一不忘的是你的名字
我什么都能忘记 但唯一不忘的是你的样子
sunday syndrome had fell upon me again.. hmm.. sigh..
now i realise why is it so difficult to quit once you're addicted to something.. no wonder my friends wanna quit smoking yet still cant..
channel 8, 7pm show.. ah wang is so innocent, so forgiving.. so touching the things he did.. always think of others before self.. if only one can have his goodness(couldn't think of a suitable word)..
now i realise why is it so difficult to quit once you're addicted to something.. no wonder my friends wanna quit smoking yet still cant..
channel 8, 7pm show.. ah wang is so innocent, so forgiving.. so touching the things he did.. always think of others before self.. if only one can have his goodness(couldn't think of a suitable word)..
Saturday, 19 April 2008
came back from serving.. an overwhelming crowd of children with so little teachers today.. 90+ children to 7 teachers.. anyway.. played for the service for so many weeks, yet i feel that i still doesn't play well.. but today mad actually said it's ok encourages me..
you're the only person that says my hair is not bad.. hmm.. out of so many people that sees me.. anyway.. i really didnt expect to cut like this.. wasnt in the right frame of mind when i went to cut.. just said cut then cut le.. so ya.. thanks anyway..
you're the only person that says my hair is not bad.. hmm.. out of so many people that sees me.. anyway.. i really didnt expect to cut like this.. wasnt in the right frame of mind when i went to cut.. just said cut then cut le.. so ya.. thanks anyway..
soo tired yesterday.. soc training in the morning, icct in the evening.. especially icct, doing rolling break fall.. roll here and there.. making us all dizzy and headache.. so ya.. cg combined with junkang's.. reached there, waited for quite sometime before cg starts at 830pm.. then, we had worship for quite some time.. i thought it was not as good cause i was perspiring all over, it was quite stuffy and hot.. everytime the fan turned to my direction i was like, God please make the fan stop there.. anyway.. junkang preached in a funny manner but yet so true.. he started off even without following the sermon, but had already preached quite alot.. the word that he didn't follow the sermon actually speak right to me.. really.. i know God is really speaking to me.. but yet it was such a struggle.. the sermon was on prayer.. he was preaching about praying and then link to alot other things.. before cg ended, we splitted to our connect groups to pray.. we were supposed to share about our prayer life and stuffs so that we can pray for one another.. somehow, there's something that i didn't share, one of my cgm actually prayed for me in that area.. was touched.. anyway.. junkang was quite high.. and he speaks like xt.. i mean the pace.. haha.. and he was somewhat funny la..
Thursday, 17 April 2008
maybe i'm too good at acting..
been having insomnia.. i should be very tired, i mean i am.. doing icct everyday.. intermediate close combat trainings.. front breakfalls, back breakfalls, side breakfalls, locks and stuffs.. falling so many times.. my friends said that i'm too active and asked if i'm on drugs cause i kept doing side breakfalls even during breaks.. anyway, the moment i lie on my bed, i just couldn't get to sleep.. probably will fall asleep after an hour or so.. hmmm.. too many things running through my mind.. should get myself more busy so that i'll be more tired man.. haha.. even tried doing some exercises so that i'll be more tired..
oh i watched good luck chuck..
it's so true.. the word of God..
been having insomnia.. i should be very tired, i mean i am.. doing icct everyday.. intermediate close combat trainings.. front breakfalls, back breakfalls, side breakfalls, locks and stuffs.. falling so many times.. my friends said that i'm too active and asked if i'm on drugs cause i kept doing side breakfalls even during breaks.. anyway, the moment i lie on my bed, i just couldn't get to sleep.. probably will fall asleep after an hour or so.. hmmm.. too many things running through my mind.. should get myself more busy so that i'll be more tired man.. haha.. even tried doing some exercises so that i'll be more tired..
oh i watched good luck chuck..
it's so true.. the word of God..
Saturday, 12 April 2008
the testimonies during the makeup cell group really blessed me.. eugene's comments are funny man.. anyway.. had a word during the cell group, just when the worship starts..
Philippians 4:6-7
Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.
i shall end my post with this..
Matthew 12:34
For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks.
Proverbs 18:21
Death and life are in the power of the tongue.
indeed, your words will frame somebody's world.
Philippians 4:6-7
Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.
i shall end my post with this..
Matthew 12:34
For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks.
Proverbs 18:21
Death and life are in the power of the tongue.
indeed, your words will frame somebody's world.
Tuesday, 8 April 2008
long weekend for me, a good rest and a good time out.. went out for dinner with jt and mingli on wed night since mingli asked.. so funny to talk to them together.. haha.. on the way back.. jt asked me who do i trust most.. probably in cg.. a tough question which i'm also unsure of the answer.. cause many changes happen so fast so abruptly.. nvm.. went out with jt and hf the next day! we were supposed to go sentosa at first, but hf suggested to go eat dim sum instead at tanjong pagar.. all ready to go and when it's about time, hf changed her mind to watching Rule #1 at vivo.. anyway.. so we went and were late but anyway.. the show was not that good.. plot wasn't good.. the twist is weird.. anyway.. we walked around vivo after the show and went hx's place to catch the 9pm show.. and then met jeanie for supper.. a long day but was good..
oh.. i was watching westside story to spend some of my free time.. hmm.. i cried somehow.. guess was touched by the show.. and somehow i felt God's presence.. speaking to me.. anyhow, it was not the first time i'm watching..
celebrated cecillia's birthday! quite a no. of people's birthday this week.. david boo, jonathan cai and cecillia.. cecillia invited so many people to celebrate with her.. haven seen all of them for quite some time and what's more, fellowshipping together.. but somehow, didn't managed to talk to most of them, in the end only talked to peter and her 2 brothers.. oh talking bout cheesiang, he's quite funny.. sitting at the corner without anyone to talk to so i asked him to sit outside with us.. had a good talk with him.. one funny thing he said.. talking bout his studies and was saying about asking yulan to teach him.. and he said yulan says she also zi shen nan bao.. i guess it's the way he said, very funny.. hahah.. anyway.. had to book in.. so sad.. gotta leave early..
jonathan is going to enlist this thursday.. so fast.. pray that you'll have a good time there..
oh.. i was watching westside story to spend some of my free time.. hmm.. i cried somehow.. guess was touched by the show.. and somehow i felt God's presence.. speaking to me.. anyhow, it was not the first time i'm watching..
celebrated cecillia's birthday! quite a no. of people's birthday this week.. david boo, jonathan cai and cecillia.. cecillia invited so many people to celebrate with her.. haven seen all of them for quite some time and what's more, fellowshipping together.. but somehow, didn't managed to talk to most of them, in the end only talked to peter and her 2 brothers.. oh talking bout cheesiang, he's quite funny.. sitting at the corner without anyone to talk to so i asked him to sit outside with us.. had a good talk with him.. one funny thing he said.. talking bout his studies and was saying about asking yulan to teach him.. and he said yulan says she also zi shen nan bao.. i guess it's the way he said, very funny.. hahah.. anyway.. had to book in.. so sad.. gotta leave early..
jonathan is going to enlist this thursday.. so fast.. pray that you'll have a good time there..
Saturday, 22 March 2008
feeling quite down just now.. so much wanted to go for the earlier service.. went for the latter one.. didnt managed to get centre seats but anyhow.. it's ok.. whole service was good.. presence of God was strong.. altar call, seeing so so so many people responded.. i felt so happy for them, yet feeling sad bout myself.. and many things running through my mind as pastor preached, and as he gave the altar call..
super full, ordered alot of food at bedok interchange.. cab back but the journey time almost same as taking train.. booking in tmr morning.. awaiting for next weekend..
super full, ordered alot of food at bedok interchange.. cab back but the journey time almost same as taking train.. booking in tmr morning.. awaiting for next weekend..
the drama this year is pretty good.. though i didnt attend any service today, i just peek during the drama.. hmm.. probably this week is big day week, i'm actually surprised that some ushers were really.. almost made me agitated.. haha
went out of the hall to get some black trashbags for children's church games.. wanted to enter from the rear door and the usher didnt want to let me in..
usher: where are you all from?
me: i'm serving.
usher: what ministry?
me: children's church.
usher: next time pls wear your tag. (looking away)
seriously, he sounded quite attitude.. my another cch friend was there and agreed.. ok probably my fault for not wearing tag? but who wears the tag to serve in expo..other than usher, chorus board people? and in addition, my tag is inside expo.. hmm..
anyway.. was booking seats for the next service.. i understand that there are people who walked in and looked for ushers for seats.. but..
usher: are you taking the whole row?
me: ya.
usher: where are your members?
me: they're walking in. should be reaching soon.
usher: i have some people who are here already and they need the seats.
me: but they are coming in and they are in the queue to come in. can i keep the seats longer?
usher: no!
that no leaves me with nothing to say.. thank God my cgl came just when he said no and he walked away.. anyway.. it's ok.. i didnt really take it to heart about them.. haha.. cause serving children's church is good.. baby esther was here today! playing for the service, seeing the happy face probably made my day.. was considering whether to serve or go service just now.. asked hx and she didnt mind me serving so ya.. though i didnt really serve for the first service cause i was watching the drama and my heart wasn't really there.. just helped out abit..
something off.. watched gong zhu xiao mei.. i randomly said zhuo wen xuan is pretty..oh, hx, me and hf were talking.. hx said she thinks angela is better.. then she goes... in chinese
hx: but we have something in common. both of us think that chen feng ling is pretty..
hf: ??
hx: now called chen jin xuan.. oh i realise mx likes all the xuans.. chen jin xuan.. zhuo wen xuan.. and owyang huixuan..
me: -.-.. oh and one more...
hx: who?
me: ren jia xuan.. selina..
hx: hahah.. aiya.. but somebody likes girls that clip their hair left, clip their hair right.. of course i cant clip my hair.. dont know something something *il..
oh.. cecilia told me something that i had thought it might be and it really is.. though i always think that it would never happen.. the things that she told me, i understand cause i really felt the same way.. sometimes that kind of pressure is really unreasonable.. i mean probably everyone assume and expect us to act that way but never really ask how we feel.. oh.. i was also discussing about multiplication and reshuffling with jon when we were having lunch in bedok.. hmm it's quite a big difference..
went out of the hall to get some black trashbags for children's church games.. wanted to enter from the rear door and the usher didnt want to let me in..
usher: where are you all from?
me: i'm serving.
usher: what ministry?
me: children's church.
usher: next time pls wear your tag. (looking away)
seriously, he sounded quite attitude.. my another cch friend was there and agreed.. ok probably my fault for not wearing tag? but who wears the tag to serve in expo..other than usher, chorus board people? and in addition, my tag is inside expo.. hmm..
anyway.. was booking seats for the next service.. i understand that there are people who walked in and looked for ushers for seats.. but..
usher: are you taking the whole row?
me: ya.
usher: where are your members?
me: they're walking in. should be reaching soon.
usher: i have some people who are here already and they need the seats.
me: but they are coming in and they are in the queue to come in. can i keep the seats longer?
usher: no!
that no leaves me with nothing to say.. thank God my cgl came just when he said no and he walked away.. anyway.. it's ok.. i didnt really take it to heart about them.. haha.. cause serving children's church is good.. baby esther was here today! playing for the service, seeing the happy face probably made my day.. was considering whether to serve or go service just now.. asked hx and she didnt mind me serving so ya.. though i didnt really serve for the first service cause i was watching the drama and my heart wasn't really there.. just helped out abit..
something off.. watched gong zhu xiao mei.. i randomly said zhuo wen xuan is pretty..oh, hx, me and hf were talking.. hx said she thinks angela is better.. then she goes... in chinese
hx: but we have something in common. both of us think that chen feng ling is pretty..
hf: ??
hx: now called chen jin xuan.. oh i realise mx likes all the xuans.. chen jin xuan.. zhuo wen xuan.. and owyang huixuan..
me: -.-.. oh and one more...
hx: who?
me: ren jia xuan.. selina..
hx: hahah.. aiya.. but somebody likes girls that clip their hair left, clip their hair right.. of course i cant clip my hair.. dont know something something *il..
oh.. cecilia told me something that i had thought it might be and it really is.. though i always think that it would never happen.. the things that she told me, i understand cause i really felt the same way.. sometimes that kind of pressure is really unreasonable.. i mean probably everyone assume and expect us to act that way but never really ask how we feel.. oh.. i was also discussing about multiplication and reshuffling with jon when we were having lunch in bedok.. hmm it's quite a big difference..
Thursday, 20 March 2008
watching the chan 8 show at 8pm.. su zhi cheng (i dont know his eng name) and mark lee started the show with a conversation that goes like this..
su: if there's only one thing that you can have, what would you want?
mark: i would want happiness.
su: why?
mark: cause if i have all the riches but if i'm not happy, it is useless.
this caused me to think of what is the one thing that i would want. it'll be God.. it's so true that many people would want happiness.. that's why many lost souls out there are rich yet have an unfulfilling life, unhappy life.. with Him, comes joy, peace and every other thing, finances etc.. seriously, what the world is looking for is actually Him.. but why are there still people that do not want to accept Him? cause they do not know about Him? they have not seen His power working? questions after questions..
anyhow, i went to serve in children's church today.. seeing all the child care children.. i saw my kindergarden too.. seeing the children, many being innocent, but some really love God, raising up their hands and acknowledging Him.. a very touching scene.. especially haven been serving main service for so long.. the presence was great.. if only the world would have the child-like mind.. if only... but rocfish said nothing will be impossible with God..
su: if there's only one thing that you can have, what would you want?
mark: i would want happiness.
su: why?
mark: cause if i have all the riches but if i'm not happy, it is useless.
this caused me to think of what is the one thing that i would want. it'll be God.. it's so true that many people would want happiness.. that's why many lost souls out there are rich yet have an unfulfilling life, unhappy life.. with Him, comes joy, peace and every other thing, finances etc.. seriously, what the world is looking for is actually Him.. but why are there still people that do not want to accept Him? cause they do not know about Him? they have not seen His power working? questions after questions..
anyhow, i went to serve in children's church today.. seeing all the child care children.. i saw my kindergarden too.. seeing the children, many being innocent, but some really love God, raising up their hands and acknowledging Him.. a very touching scene.. especially haven been serving main service for so long.. the presence was great.. if only the world would have the child-like mind.. if only... but rocfish said nothing will be impossible with God..
Saturday, 15 March 2008
was having a conversation with jp just now after serving..
jp: i think i want to find a gf next year.
me: so fast?
jp: not fast. 21 can already ma.
me: so you wanna find someone of the same age?
jp: not necessary. can be younger ma.
me: what if the girl you like wanna focus on spiritual things and not ready for relationship?
jp: that's why must find a girl that is also pursuing a relationship.
me: like that you might miss out the girl that God wanna give to you.
jp: that's why must go through relationship. can focus on spiritual things and still have a relationship what. if not what is relationship for?
david: preparation for marriage. -> -.-
me: to get to know each other better?
jp: friends also can get to know each other better what.
and we kinda ended there cause i didnt know what to continue.. pondering.. the power of focus..
anyway still sick.. but when i was serving.. didnt really feel sick at all.. probably it's nice to see the smile and joy..
jp: i think i want to find a gf next year.
me: so fast?
jp: not fast. 21 can already ma.
me: so you wanna find someone of the same age?
jp: not necessary. can be younger ma.
me: what if the girl you like wanna focus on spiritual things and not ready for relationship?
jp: that's why must find a girl that is also pursuing a relationship.
me: like that you might miss out the girl that God wanna give to you.
jp: that's why must go through relationship. can focus on spiritual things and still have a relationship what. if not what is relationship for?
david: preparation for marriage. -> -.-
me: to get to know each other better?
jp: friends also can get to know each other better what.
and we kinda ended there cause i didnt know what to continue.. pondering.. the power of focus..
anyway still sick.. but when i was serving.. didnt really feel sick at all.. probably it's nice to see the smile and joy..
gastric flu is quite unbearable.. considering the pain in the stomach.. unable to eat.. unable to rest well.. haven recover.. but i'm part of the team in the exercise next week.. i pray that i'll be able to recover in time.. so due to the exercise, gotta book in at 6pm on sunday to prepare our stuffs and team equipment.. that's like so early.. and next sunday i have cos duty.. hmm.. and it's easter.. should i sell it.. haha..
Monday, 10 March 2008
i'm sick.. very very very sick.. since sunday evening.. couldn't think properly.. didn't booked in cause i seriously can't move.. high fever causing tremendous head pain, stomach pain, whole body aching.. seriously felt like i was dying.. so many people called me, so many smses.. of all time, then i can't reply.. anyway.. still the pain in my head is still there.. visited the doctor just now.. i think she kinda thought i'm faking illness.. i told her i had high fever last night.. she took my temperature and it seems normal.. told her my stomach pain.. she pressed but i can't really tell her which part is more painful.. you know it's like stomach very suan those kinda feeling not the blue black pain feeling.. i told her yday's breakfast had something wrong cause after eating it i couldn't eat anything else but she said that it does not have relation to fever and said must be cause i didn't eat that's why.. but seriously, i think something's wrong with my breakfast.. anyhow she told me probably i do not have enough sleep recently or i am very stressed that caused me to be sick.. i'm very tired..
Saturday, 8 March 2008
another verse just came to me as i was on my way back.. i was thinking about what ailing shared during offering in cg, Luke6:38.. then i felt discouraged.. cause i do not have enough to spend.. thinking bout how much my next pay will be and how much i would need to pay my debts.. it's like no different from my usual pay in the past.. i would be left with very little to spend the next month again..
then was tempted again.. but anyway.. Matthew6:21 just came to me.. where my heart is.. probably i've spent too much.. but then again.. i also gave alot to God.. it's where my heart will be..
pray pray pray for finances..
then was tempted again.. but anyway.. Matthew6:21 just came to me.. where my heart is.. probably i've spent too much.. but then again.. i also gave alot to God.. it's where my heart will be..
pray pray pray for finances..
today one of my camp mate said something funny about me.. cause i was eating the usual bee hoon with egg at gedong camp.. he was saying that i always eat the same thing which ever camp i go to.. nee soon camp i'll always eat the hor fun, that camp always bee hoon, at my camp always eat the rice with the same dishes.. so before that we were talking bout one of my instructor, the staff sgt, who just got divorce cause he had an affair.. and my camp mate said that next time when i choose my wife i'll be faithful and stick with her forever..
anyway.. even in army camps.. ns people also can have affairs outside even when they see guys everyday.. sometimes when i see people.. people who are not really bad quite nice, but they're not saved.. and i'll feel helpless when i cant do anything about it.. probably pray.. need to have more opportunities..
anyway.. even in army camps.. ns people also can have affairs outside even when they see guys everyday.. sometimes when i see people.. people who are not really bad quite nice, but they're not saved.. and i'll feel helpless when i cant do anything about it.. probably pray.. need to have more opportunities..
Sunday, 2 March 2008
Thursday, 21 February 2008
Monday, 18 February 2008
i think whenever i'm with my ns mates.. i'll tend to be more free.. probably cause i won't think so much and forget all my worries.. haha.. i'm still quite free till this week..
hmm.. come to think of it.. i realise my chinese standard has dropped.. i mean i can't seem to remember how to write the words and probably forgot most of the idioms.. i can read but sometimes will forget how to write.. maybe i should start reading the chinese dictionary..
hmm.. come to think of it.. i realise my chinese standard has dropped.. i mean i can't seem to remember how to write the words and probably forgot most of the idioms.. i can read but sometimes will forget how to write.. maybe i should start reading the chinese dictionary..
Sunday, 17 February 2008
don't know why.. but i really dislike coming home.. every time when i reach home, probably not every time but this time, i'll feel something weird.. suddenly i feel so dry.. many thoughts will suddenly go through my mind.. something's really wrong with me.. seems that the devil is putting pressure on my relationship with people.. trying to put down the people around me.. sometimes it seems so true.. that i am suddenly being taken forgranted.. hmm.. i did change my blog url for that moment.. didn't want to let people see what i wanna blog.. probably wj you're right.. i'm probably being emo again.. it's the weird feeling.. hmmm.. hah
Saturday, 16 February 2008
it's so weird.. i just found my camp passes.. it's passes not pass.. yesterday i was searching high and low for them.. i'm sure i searched my bag thoroughly and they're not inside or anywhere.. but i just remembered that i had to search for it and when i opened my bag compartment just now, it was inside.. this is the 2nd time my camp pass disappeared and reappear the next day.. 1st time was in sispec in my bunk.. i lost it somehow and my friends help me to search around the bunk. but next day, it just reappear beside my boots.. it's just so weird.. oh.. losing one camp pass gotta pay $50, make a police report plus extras.. what's more i had 2 camp passes clipped together..
what a v day.. haha didn't do anything much.. course ended before lunch.. so went home first.. met up my friends to go polyclinic together.. got mc for friday.. first time i see people wanted to get mc but failed.. haha.. then we went to watch Jumper.. it was nice.. my friend asked why do cinemas have front row seats when nobody wants.. quite silly and i said they're for the officers.. ha.. anyway.. yday rested at home.. packed my stuffs.. my mum actually said i am so obedient to pack my things yday.. oh man.. this weekend may be activated.. pray that it'll be just replying with a sms and not to report back to camp..
Tuesday, 12 February 2008
Monday, 11 February 2008
Sunday, 10 February 2008
morning go for expo service.. after service come home.. since it is so, why not i just attend sunday jw service? it's different just because i'm anchoring that service and probably i'll meet lesser friends..
i don't like the feeling of being lost, having nowhere to go after service.. probably it's me.. the changes still affecting me even after so long.. sometimes i'll still wonder why must this happen.. how come i'm part of it.. i have the feeling that nobody knows.. it's true.. nobody knows..
expo service is great.. every sunday morning, i'll wake up with great expectancy to go for service at expo.. but....
i'm probably still hanging on to going expo service because....
today is keenan's birthday.. though you'll not see it.. but Happy Birthday boy..
i don't like the feeling of being lost, having nowhere to go after service.. probably it's me.. the changes still affecting me even after so long.. sometimes i'll still wonder why must this happen.. how come i'm part of it.. i have the feeling that nobody knows.. it's true.. nobody knows..
expo service is great.. every sunday morning, i'll wake up with great expectancy to go for service at expo.. but....
i'm probably still hanging on to going expo service because....
today is keenan's birthday.. though you'll not see it.. but Happy Birthday boy..
Saturday, 2 February 2008
Sunday, 27 January 2008
by right, i am not allowed to blog about camp stuffs.. but everyday stay-in.. what more can i say? i am trying to talk bout more interesting stuffs i do.. just didnt wanna blog bout unhappy stuffs.. though there are many things happening.. but.. aiya.. i'm boring.. so.....
that's why i
didnt like blogging
from the beginning
Tuesday, 15 January 2008
finally back to unit.. promoted.. supposed to be happy but......
alot of regiments suddenly.. beret on once out of coy office, march to cookhouse for meals, all windows open 45° etc.. it's so strict.. and 3SG marching to cookhouse.. so ridiculous.. make us look like man...
nothing much to do the past few days.. pple playing psp but i don feel like it, bored.. suddenly lost when i don know what to do.. don even feel like sleeping.. anyway, have been dreaming in my sleep..
nights out today.. but no one seems to want to go out..
alot of regiments suddenly.. beret on once out of coy office, march to cookhouse for meals, all windows open 45° etc.. it's so strict.. and 3SG marching to cookhouse.. so ridiculous.. make us look like man...
nothing much to do the past few days.. pple playing psp but i don feel like it, bored.. suddenly lost when i don know what to do.. don even feel like sleeping.. anyway, have been dreaming in my sleep..
nights out today.. but no one seems to want to go out..
i don know what to do
is it gonna be a dejavu
i pray that it's not..
Tuesday, 1 January 2008
Happy New Year! i'm blogging on the first day of 2008.. haha
just came back from a soccer game with the security.. all muddy.. what a year to start with on the first day.. didnt had a good game.. but anyway.. forget bout everything..
been having this weird feeling since yday after movie.. I Am Legend was great.. though i fell asleep A WHILE somewhere at the beginning.. ending abit abrupt but anyway.. don't know why but felt weird after the movie.. keep having thoughts in my mind which i don't know what.. feeling abit lost.. same feeling after the game just now.. after washing up abit.. don't know what to do.. hmmm.. drastic changes happening..
just came back from a soccer game with the security.. all muddy.. what a year to start with on the first day.. didnt had a good game.. but anyway.. forget bout everything..
been having this weird feeling since yday after movie.. I Am Legend was great.. though i fell asleep A WHILE somewhere at the beginning.. ending abit abrupt but anyway.. don't know why but felt weird after the movie.. keep having thoughts in my mind which i don't know what.. feeling abit lost.. same feeling after the game just now.. after washing up abit.. don't know what to do.. hmmm.. drastic changes happening..
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